fAt as you R noT

For a while I've been thinking about getting rid of this blog and start with a new one, but I guess it's too hard for me to do it, I just CAN'T.

So this is about me starting over again. I have gained weight so much that I can't even count w my fingers how many pounds I've gained, which is embarrasing. Today it wasn't my day, actually I did worse than yesterday and I think that's not helping me with this situation.

IN:
Apple-60
300 gr light cheese- 300
Apple-60
Apple-60
Cookies-100

Total: 580

I'm sure I ate more than that but I don't know the amount of it, several things of what I ate must have been 100 more calories, which means I'm totally worthless...Let's see if I can keep up with less than 700 calories everyday.

Not a fashion statement.

Sorry I didn't write these last few days, I've been doing some stuff and activities my doctor told me to, in order to become responsible for once and all, anyway it's just a bit annoying to get up at 9 and clean then clean and blah blah, I hate responsabilities, and I hate them so much so so much.

So, it's been two days since I have started working out, or maybe three, but well even when it was just for a 20 minutes I still did something. Anyways, I think I'm the laziest person in the whole freaking world.

Anyway. I gotta go and do some cleaning my dogs are just crazy eating paper. Crap I have to go and clean that now.

FuCK! I Don'T like sisters.

  Have you ever felt like everyone is against you? Well, I have. And that's my sister. Fuck her, she doesn't understand ME, she doesn't care about anything. I wrote in my nickmane in MSN, about the 40 day challenge I heard from I don't remember who, BUT the only thing she said to me was:
- 40 day challenge?
- yeah...:D
- Are you on drugs or something?
- What?????
- Nothing.

What THE FUCK is going on with you??? Isn't enough to just fuck my life with your attitude all the time, but now you come and talk to me about drugs, you are such an idiot. I don't care what you think about me, and if I ever were on drugs I wouldn't put it ON MY FREAKIN NICKNAME SO THAT everyone CAN read it, what the fuck ???!!!!! YOU ARE AN ASS.

People just don't understand anything about anything. And they seem to try to understand, but it's just a fake face so they can get something from you. At least in my case. I don't care about you anymore, sister.
You know you can be wherever you want with whoever you want, WHENEVER YOU WANT and I WONT FUCKIN CARE. She never wanted me to be skinny, just because she is not doesn't mean I have to be LIKE YOU. I WILL NEVER BE LIKE YOU!!!!! Well yeah, I'm now fat, like you, but i wont' be like you anymore, motherfuckah. My times as a fat pig are over, and they already have a grave with my name on it.

You don't want me to be skinny RIGHT! you don't want me to be happy, you just can think ABOUT me being as miserable as YOU!!! WELL FUCK YOU! CAUSE I WONT!!
People like you make me wanna throw up, right in front of your face, you make me SICK. AHHH.

Well I was definitely mad at that time, now I'm better cause I know I'll be starting THE diet in no time. To all of the one who are dieting, good luck, and yeah I know we can lose weight, and show THEM (if there's a THEM) that we can do it, FOR ourselves, and not because we want a big ass to show to some stupid guys with no common sense. If that's it then fuck that, cause I'm not losing IT for someone, but for me.

PERIOD.

Some things ppl don't actually know

Long time I haven't been writing, and now I have tons of time because I'm taking a break with school (just 4 months). Anyway, I was looking at some videos at youtube, and I saw a video about anorexia, and some label before you watched it "warning you": Yeah this is not intent to be thinspiration but to make the ones who are struggling this think. Or some shit like that. So I watched it, was actually like 2 minutes or less. And I got so mad, because the video had pictures of girls or boys whatever they were, like ultra skinny, like they were not anorexic, they were fucking sick about some desnutrition in their country. I just saw that as an insult to them, they did not want to be like that and the video was like accusing people like us, of wanting to be like them. Those fuckers, and I answered of course to that video because I think they were actually saying that we wanted to be thin for guys or like whatever.

1. Anorexic people might have started to get sick because of a broken relationship related with men, but not always.

2. The reasons why anorexia is cause are not yet known, and I fucking know this because I wrote an essay for my English class about Anorexia and the Media

3. Do you think all anorexic girls care about how a man looks at her? As for me, when I got so sick I didn't give a damn about what guys thought about me, all what I cared about was my body and if I liked myself enough, FOR ME.

4. A girl is not prettier because she has a BIG BUTT to show, WHY DON't YOU THINK ASSHOLE?

5. Anorexic girls might not be 100% happy and maybe choosing starvation as a way to lose weight was not the best idea, but at least we have more brain than you, idiot.

I made my point.

New FASHION BLOG!

Hey SO, this is my new fashion blog, at blogger.com

www.notmusicalme.blogspot.com

please visit it, and comment if you like it. I´m sure you will! I'll post many of the fashion trends I like, and it's such a great way for motivation.

Loves.

Larissa (aka Rui Sha)